The Passive Activist

Morning,

I’ve been listening to a lot of Thich Nhat Hanh recently; particularly his book on communication. I have included some links to some of his teachings embedded within this missive which I hope may be of some use.

I’m conscious about how much I get pulled into the news, scrolling, feeling desperate, dreadful, inert.

I’m conscious about how I have recently written poems about Nicole Renee Good and Alex Pritti, but not about Keith Porter or Charlie Kirk and haven’t written any about many other things for a while.

How, whilst I claim to stand for rehumanising, one poem at a time, I make subconscious choices about what I witness with words and the subtle impact that can have.

How the demand on social media for us to witness everything, not be complicit, speak up about X if you are speaking up about Y, is paralysing.

I find social media to be full of blame in these matters, which instantly reminds me of my frustration triangle. Blame exists when someone accountable is not holding themselves to account; when those in authority are not acting in accountable ways for the benefit of the people they serve and there is a sense of disempowerment. Blame is then directed elsewhere.

Which, for those who find themselves having blame directed at them (or automatically scoop it up as the little blame sponge they are) have the option of either ‘upping’ their game - which results in either burnout or performative actions or ‘self shame’ where they tell themselves they are terrible people for doing/not doing what they ‘should’ to help the situation.

And this can all then lead to apathy:

I’d rather be a passive activist.

Don’t want to raise a banner or raise my fist

Would rather give the mildest gist

That I’m not at all ok with this.

I mean, what difference does it make?

I mean, we all know that takers take,

I mean, I don’t want to make a mistake

I mean they won’t listen for Goodness sake!

I guess there’s different ways to have my say,

Could be discerning about who I pay,

Could bear a witness, not look away.

Urm, would that be enough, be ok?

I’d rather be a passive activist.

Don’t want to raise a banner, or raise my fist.

Would rather give the mildest gist..

That I’m not at all ok with this.

What I am certain of is that meaningful change means getting off the frustration triangle. Whilst I am clear about how an individual can go about that, I am less certain about how we do it as a society.

It does, I believe, begin in community. Which comes back around to the rehumanising part; to us being able to recognise and own our own discriminations which are borne out of upbringing, ignorance or fear.

And that requires spaces to process and share our feelings in community. Not online through reposts, but through face to face spaces. Where we can sit with each other’s pain and process. Where we can recognise that this is what unites us - that we all love, hurt, hate, because we are all human.

Perhaps this is our common ground and way out of the frustration triangle, as a collective.

I thought I was going to write about the loneliness of family estrangement today, based on a subscriber’s reply to the prompt yesterday. I do trust the process though, of opening my heart to the page and seeing what transpires.

I SWEAR as I started to write this missive I had no idea where it was going to go, but I have to say I think that these kind of spaces is exactly what I am trying to create with my Permission to Feel workshops.

The first one, on 3rd March, will be around loneliness; the shame that it can create; the inevitability of it, the commonality of it. We’ll move and write and explore, sharing what we discover in a way that feels true, respectful of ourselves and each other, and honest.

You can see more details here.

Most of all, I want it to be a collaborative space. A space where we come together for two hours, grow something special and then all leave a little bit changed for the better, more resourced and more resilient.

What do you think? I’d love to know your thoughts.

And for my lovely paid subscribers, here is the prompt for today.